Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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