So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
