It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize