I can't breathe out the right side of my face
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
