If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize