how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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