I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Say something about gay babies.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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