We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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