Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
