i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
