i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
That's how pantless uber rides happen
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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