Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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