Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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