Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
