Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
