That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
