6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
