He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Randomize
