so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
