If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize