Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
