Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Sext me about skeletons
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
