I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
