This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
