she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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