Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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