the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
