In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize