I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
