My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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