He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
