My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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