i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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