I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
