when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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