i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
