I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize