ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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