If that was your dad, he is hot
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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