Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
