Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
