Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
