I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
