the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
