I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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