Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
