So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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