Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
