I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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