Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
