i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
